At seventy-one years old, this is a time to focus on living a life of gratitude and continuing to grow into the man of God I aspire to be. It is a time to reflect on life’s experiences and pay homage to the fact that, despite everything that has happened—and everything that hasn’t—I am still standing.
I am the sum total of my experiences—my accomplishments and my disappointments—yet I take comfort in knowing that I did the best I could with what I knew at the time. I often reflect on the timeless words my father would say throughout my youth: “I may not be the man that I want to be, but I thank God that I am not the man that I used to be.”
In line with what is often emphasized in the workforce, life is about continuous improvement. There is always room to grow. Scripture even reminds us that our best days are still ahead. Today, I strive to live in a way that reflects my true worth, not defined by my circumstances, but grounded in the presence of God within me. I remain mindful of delighting myself in His ways.
I am an advocate for the transformation process that the Bible encourages us to embrace—to not be conformed to the world, but to be transformed by the renewing of the mind. Facing mental health challenges as a young adult was a pivotal time in my life. At the time, I did not realize that my journey would eventually impact not only my life, but the lives of many others.
Adversity can become our greatest asset, and that has certainly been true for me. I recall the words of a minister who said, “The Lord will place you in a situation, bring you out of it, and then send you back to help others.” Speaking openly about mental health has become a mountaintop experience for me. For a long time, I was very private about my struggles. It wasn’t until I began preparing a book that I realized the importance of sharing my story.
Going public was new for me, but once I began to speak, it became something I could not hold back. It was a cathartic experience—a release of years of thoughts and emotions. I knew it was time to move forward with a message that could impact others who are struggling with mental health or who have loved ones facing similar challenges.
In the grand scheme of things, our time here is limited, so living your best life is your contribution to humanity. I am grateful for the opportunity to serve others and to demonstrate that there is life after adversity—even in the face of mental health challenges. The Creator allowed me to endure an experience that could have been destructive to my psyche, yet I have also witnessed many individuals whose outcomes were not as fortunate, whose minds were not restored.
As my brother Abdul once said, I became a better person because of my experiences. I was later given the opportunity to serve as a mental health worker on a nursing team in a clinical setting. Even before my employment, during my final hospitalization in a state hospital, I developed a desire to work with individuals facing mental illness. I ended up in that state hospital after my insurance had run out.
It was 1979, and I was on a roller coaster ride, disillusioned with the mental healthcare system. My first major mental health crisis occurred in 1976, before I turned twenty-one, resulting in hospitalization. Although I had struggled before that episode, the experience significantly impacted my self-esteem. I became angry, defiant, and consumed with misplaced blame.
I believed that I could function without medication and manage life on my own. I resisted therapy and failed to see its value. I assumed that medication would only be temporary, not realizing that my journey would be much longer than expected. Like many others, I did not fully understand what it meant to be a patient navigating the complexities of the mental health system.
In my attempt to live independently without treatment, I became noncompliant with my medication, which led to a severe relapse. I experienced a full-blown episode of dissociation and disorientation—far worse than before. That year, I was hospitalized three separate times, ultimately leading to my commitment to a state hospital. My family pleaded with me to seek help, but at that point, I was beyond reason.
However, that final hospitalization became a turning point in my life. When I finally accepted that I needed help, everything began to change. The trajectory of my life shifted. Today, I live with purpose, embracing the totality of my experiences. I hold onto the belief that what was meant for harm in my life, God has used for my good.